"'Tis better far for us to strive, Our useless cares from us to drive..."

Sometimes I feel like when one big trial comes up, it absolutely must be followed by three or four other big trials. I'm not really sure why that has to be, but for some reason that's the way it goes. Personally, I'm ready for it all to be over... Just in time for volleyball to start and life to get insanely hectic.

Jeff was called as first counselor in our ward's bishopric on Sunday. I'm so excited for him, but I'm not excited at all for me. Sitting alone in the congregation at Sacrament Meeting is not fun in a married ward. Because, as my sister-in-law describes it, such meetings truly are a cuddle fest. I think I'm going to start sitting in the very front pew on the side, because then I don't have to see all the girls behind me all happy because they get to sit by their husbands in Sacrament Meeting. Last Sunday I felt like a total loser, even though I shouldn't have because I'm married like every other girl in the ward.

It's really hard to make friends in a married ward. You meet in Relief Society, have the general "Hi, how are you? Where are you living? When did you get married? Are you working or in school? Where do you work? What are you studying?" and after Relief Society you never talk to them again. You don't hang out, because that would mean time taken out of alone time with husband, and a lot of times you don't even sit by each other ever again.

Okay, so I'm not overly worried about that, I know it's kinda silly for me to be worried about that, but what I'm mostly worried about is our schedule for fall and the fact that I don't think I'm first counselor's wife material. First, during fall semester our schedule is going to be crazy. Sunday was going to be practically the only day we had together, but now Jeff will be really busy on Sunday. Joy.

I kind of wish that this could have been put off another month. I'm definitely not back to normal after my surgery. And I'm still dealing with effects of the stupid medicines they had me on before and after my surgery. I've dealt with some of these for a month, and it's getting really old. Then there are family things stressing me out that I don't know how to deal with and I know that I am definitely not the ideal bishopric member's wife. They're supposed to be these women who are so put-together, who have spotless homes and are so service-oriented. They're friendly and don't complain about their husbands spending lots of time doing calling stuff. They're patient and don't mind being put on the back burner for a couple years while their husband serves the ward. Especially after the last month and a half, I am not that kind of woman. My house is a disaster, I haven't volunteered for service things in the ward because when I get home from work every day, I'm just exhausted and don't want to do anything. I don't think I've cooked dinner for Jeff in months. Trying to make friends in Relief Society seems pointless to me. *sigh* So not ready for this. I'm pretty sure I'm way too young to be the first counselor's wife, anyway.

Okay, enough ranting. Maybe I need to play the glad game, like from Polyanna. I got to read Sense and Sensibility last week while we were at the cabin, and I got to spend a lot of time with Jeff that week. My sister's bridal shower on Tuesday was a success, besides the gyoza. It's Friday (Friday, gotta get down on Friday), which means it's the weekend and maybe Jeff and I can do something if he studies for the GRE long enough. I have a bunch of patterns and sewing projects to work on. There's a new Phineas and Ferb on tonight (juvenile, I know...). I just got new medicine that will hopefully fix one of my problems. And yesterday was the two-year anniversary of the first time Jeff kissed me and when he decided I was his girlfriend. To make it even better, he sent me a picture of a pretty flower because he didn't want to pick it due to it being on school grounds (not quite the same as a real flower, but it was cute because he thought of it by himself) and he gave me a candy bar his senior missionaries gave him. He actually remembered! Which is lots of brownie points for him.